Snowtastic!

Figure 1. SNOW!!! EVERYWHERE!!!!!

The day can suck, I may not be employed in a permanent position, but it snowed. It is snowing like Sweden! I am beyond happy. I am on cloud 9 billion.

The first snow I can remember being in! I have photos. Hundreds and hundreds of photos!

I LOVE SNOW!!!!

Now this is BAM!

Lost in London

Figure 1. Lost, but happy...

This popped up on post-secret a few Sundays ago. It seems hauntingly relevant for me… I have never been so lost, and yet, I have never been so happy. I suppose I am not really lost, but I have no clue with what path to take or what direction is right, but regardless, I am at peace and have never been so happy. Thank you London.

So, as I stood over MY small sink in MY teeney cottagey kitchen in MY large and airy house in London – it hit me. I have no fucking idea what I am doing. I am completely lost. But in the same breath, I am light of heart and happy. I have risked it all and am feeling truly the little fishy in the big pond, yet feel like the world is at my fingertips and that I am blessed on a path to success. It is the strangest feeling in the world… To be so scared, so excited, so peaceful, and even a bit sad all in one go. Wow.

I love my house. It is AMAZING! And so homely. Filled with love and awesomeness. After we gave the landlady a good ear-bashing over the state we received it in, the gripes have been repaired and it is starting to fill out into a home. I even sat at the dining room table and looked out onto the street below as the cold rain pattered onto the window pane as the graying light of 4pm set in and it felt real. I am really here. I am in London.

It was a serious week of revelations… I also realized, no matter how down you feel, how homesick and afraid, you cannot help but crack a smile and bubble with excitement as you sit in the early evening darkness in your full-length, tailored coat on the top level of a double-decker bus and look out over the glittering, meandering Thames to see the historic architecture of magnificent buildings as they marry into the glass and steel of modern London and lights twinkle off the London-eye. It truly is a fabulous place. A fabulous, fabulous place.

Figure 2. You call it alcoholism, I call it therapy!

And then today – SURPRISE numerical reasoning test. I passed the practice test with 100% accuracy, but failed on time. The real test, well, I only answered 14 of the 18 questions. I had 17 minutes to complete the test. Does one get hired on a 60% performance? Doubtful. But, I had a wonderful weep over this situation. And feel a lot better. Also helped by my half price bottle of Rose wine!

Now for the goldfishies... (The exciting bit!)

Figure 3. Lie back and think of England!

On the Goldfish front… well, I have been sneaking up the scoreboard. I met this fishy off the dating website and went out for drinks on a Monday night… a LOT of drinks later and we stole a cheeky snog. Saw him again on Thursday and keep in “text” (that is British for SMS) contact all the time. Like this one, so being chilled and seeing how it goes.

I don’t have the BAM in me right now… But it hasn’t died out yet. I’m fighting the London battle, and I’m fighting hard.

Two things I always must remember:

1. 11. Nobody said it’d be easy; they just promised it’d be worth it.

2. 22. Whatever you do; do it as if the entire world was watching!

Giving it as much bam as I can...

The Colossal Castle

Figure 1. Sofa surfing is done!

Feel it. It is here!

NO.MORE.SOFA-SURFING! I am done. Caput. Finito. Le Fin. Woop woop!

Thank you most graciously to all the friends who put me up for “just one week”… We all know that “just one week” to an African in London constitutes at least one month.

Figure 2. Lady Tooter II and her hired help

But my time has come. I am off and finally moving into Tooting Manor with my gingah surgeon loving best friend. I will have a bed! OMG!!!!! I’m so excited I may have pee-d myself a little. So far I have managed to convince her we need a Union Jack themed lounge. Long live the Queen. Rah-Rah. I am working on getting a burnt-orange coloured front door, but this is proving rather tricky. The issue with moving house in London is that there is no-one to do it for you. Unlike in Africa where you pay said removal and packing firm and go out for a boozey lunch in Sandton only to return to your new abode unpacked and shimmering. I am going to be lugging my wheelie-bags (and oh how full they are!) across London by bus, tube, boat (I may get lost…) and eventually into my Manor. Despite this. I cannot wait! It is time to take to the throne. And oh how well I shall alight to my position of monarchy as the “other” Lady of the Manor – Lady Tooter II. Also, it provides and ample double bed that needs christening. Dust of your heels ladies. Daddy’s got a brand new photographic jumpsuit and it’s hunting season! BAM!

Oh. My. Testicles. It is cold. I like the cold. But seriously, autumn (a non-existant season in any case) lasted the sum total of 4 hours. The leaves turned yellow and it was winter. Surprise! I wore my coat today. I love it. It is sexy. It is cold outside. I refuse to be beaten and am not wearing my gloves yet. It’s gonna get colder…

On the goldfish front. Well, blind date went pear. Horribly horribly pear… for him! He was more queen than a tranny at a Britney tribute concert. Unfortunately, as mentioned before, there is only room for one queen in the little goldfish kingdom, and that is me! He irritated me, and then pretended I was his toy whilst he flattered me with attention and took it away at his mere whim. Unfortunately for him, I had my BAM on and proceeded to procure me two tall and strapping gents whilst out at the club – in front of him. And that put him firmly in his place. Don’t piss like a puppy if you are playing with the big dogs boys…

BAM!